I think everyone knows I believe in Karma. This is a story to exemplify its incredible power.
Wednesday I student taught & on the way back, decided to hit the BK Lounge for some eats. I order a meal & Evan (Fellow SNC ed student.) gets some other eats. The total comes to around $9. I reached into my wallet to pull out my credit card &…well it wasn’t there. Evan didn’t have all the cash on him…What would you do? Well I ripped out of the Drive Thru in shame without canceling my order. I felt bad but…really should I have? Well Karma caught me as soon as I got home.
Needing a rest, I sat down at my computer, cracked open a beer (It’s Wednesday, my mid-week drinking night.), & start checking my favorite news sites. Suddenly Evan flashes me an IM, “Hey, we need to be in class in 10min!” I had completely forgotten about an hour & a half Web cast ‘recommended’ to us by the head of education. Great, I jumped in my rig & raced to class Earnhardt style (No sudden right turns though), making it there about 5 minutes to 3.
My jaw hit the floor as I walked into the room. There was 1 other student in a conference hall built for around 100. As we closed on 3, a few more people showed up to bring the total to 5 students + 1 professor. I knew this was going to blow. Here is how everything transpired, 24 style.
3:00 Professor explains web cast concept & lets us know we are welcome to type messages to moderator if we so chose. I can’t contain my excitement.
3:01 Lecturer joins web cast & introduces topic, “Behavior & Classroom Management.” Fantastic! In my somewhat extensive student teaching experiences, I have not had a single behavior problem, not 1. I treat my students with respect in a humorous way, they return it. I am now 110% confident I’ll enjoy the hell out of this lecture.
3:02 Lecturer mentions how funny he is. I immediately know how unfunny he will be.
3:10 After pondering got the past 10 minutes or so how I can discretely do homework without blatantly revealing I don’t give a crap what is going on here, I decide to ‘take notes’ & begin doodling.
3:15 1/6 of the way through, progress.
3:19 Accidentally drop my pen down into the row in front of me, Now I have absolutely no entertainment.
3:25 Begin dismantling the binding of my legal pad in complete boredom.
3:29 Look at my professor & laugh intently as though I get WTF she is laughing at.
3:30 Tear off everything I can tear off my legal pad.
3:31 Begin trying to scoop up pen using my shoes (Each row is elevated & separated by built-in tables that extend the length of the room.).
3:40 After attempting for nearly 10 minutes, realize Doc Martens are not designed for scooping up pens. Give up after smashing me knee & almost falling out of my chair.
3:41 Realize I could write a blog on this experience that could at least entertain me. Decide to get up & retrieve my pen next interruption.
3:45 1/2 way point. Professor starts laughing again & I decide this is opportunity enough to go get pen. I walk all the way around my row & retrieve it. Thank God.
3:46 Begin penning blog.
3:51 Fellow student leaves, 4 students left to suffer.
4:03 17 minutes or writing, continually look up & act as though I am laughing.
4:06 Finally run out of things to write…24 minutes left…wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
4:07 Begin search for sharp objects.
4:09 Give up search & begin wishing I had an Allen wrench so I could dismantle the swivel chair I am sitting in.
4:10 Look over at Evan, feel better knowing he is as miserable as I am. This feeling turns to rage as I remember he is the ass that IM’d me & told me to roll out.
4:11 Evan gets up to go to the little boys room. This means he is meandering around the building exploring the joint. I get pissed I didn’t think of this.
4:14 Evan returns with a Nutty Bar. I wonder why the hell he didn’t stay away longer.
4:15 15 minutes left…I think I’ll listen so I have something to say when she asks for a review in class tomorrow.
4:16 Dude is talking about humor in the classroom while having no humor himself whatsoever. I decide if asked for a review, I will rely on my BS ability & go back to finding other forms of entertainment.
4:18 It is too late for me to take a walk, although I really want to. WHY DIDN’T I THINK OF IT EARLIER!?!? WHY!?!? I always take walks 5 minutes past the halfway point of class if I am bored. Guy just mentioned last slide & I celebrate inside. I literally had a fiesta. Reflect what a busy minute 4:18 was.
4:19 Floor is opened for questions. Pray no one will ask.
4:20 1st stupid question. Please no one else call…PLEASE!
4:21 Prayers not answered, several questions ensue.
4:27 Terrible joke, I want to beat this guy down. Seriously.
4:29 Web cast ends, thank God, 1 minute early. I race to my car.
The moral of this story, don’t go through a drive through & neglect to cancel your order before you leave. I thought I had built up a ton of Drive Thru karma through my polite & clear orders over the years. Apparently not. It doesn’t carry over. You will be stuck in hell as a result.
I have a story about my grandpa coming soon, until then…
Currently Playing…
Carrie Underwood
“Before He Cheats”
