Paul's 30th
Last night we celebrated Paul’s 30th birthday party. Nothing really notable happened, but I thought I would drop a few observations about what bad friends myself & Chris are to Jaren, & apparently good friends Chris & Miah are. A few other observations are mixed in. This was the 1st time, in what felt like in forever, that the whole crew drank together. When you mix a free keg of Bud Light & us, good things are going to happen, well not always. One of us in the group tends to be singled out in a not so positive way.
Once a decent buzz was achieved, the beating on Jaren began. I am not sure when it 1st occurred, but whenever you put Chris & I together, we beat on Jaren drunk. I don’t get it at all. J is the man, yet we get this wicked demon in our bodies that make us beat his ass. Chris came up with the great idea of giving Jaren a wedgie. He was really struggling to contain the wild beast that a drunken Jaren is. Having participated in the wedgie Jaren received at his cabin, (This was the super wedgie. The elastic on his whities was pulled flat off of his underwear, hilarious.) I felt I had the proper credentials to assist in the operation. I pinned his arms & Chris had this cop hold around the waist. We then invited Paul, the birthday boy, to have the honor of yanking his underwear flush into his ass. Paul accepted the invitation, hilarity ensued. Jaren may have laid down his best quote of all time. With a straight face he said, “You know, this feels like I am wearing a thong.” I had one question, when did Jaren find out what wearing a thong was like? Make you wonder what he was really doing when he got caught digging through Becky’s dresser drawer. :Wink:
During a short ride back to Jaren’s, we hatched a plot to assault Jaren one last time. As soon as Miah buried his Explorer in the snow bank, we hopped out & laid in wait outside Jaren’s door. He emerged from the vehicle with a definite wobble to his gait & Chris sprung 1st with me in tow. We annihilated him. When he got back up, we went back at it. Look at the pics, they are classic. Like 20 minutes later, J walks out of his bathroom & drops, “Wow, that’s cold!”
Lonnie added a whole different feel to the evening. 1st she informs us of a coworker having a crotch of fire. I never, ever wanted to know that. Her obsession with crotches of fire continued when she ‘lit’ a cigarette off of J’s fire crotch. I just bury my face in it… we were also introduced to a new porno move called the helicopter. If a had a decent sized penis, & wasn’t fearful of snapping it at the base, I would put it at the top of my sexual ‘to do’ list. With Chris as the dummy, she showed us this move (also exemplified in the pics.). The man goes in doggy style, then spins, doing a full 360 degree turn. This is while still in. I honestly don not think it is possible, & I don’t think I ever actually want to try this one. If you do pull this off & have a witness (or participant) that can corroborate your story, I have $10 for you, seriously.
More thoughts on our pics, you ever notice there ends up being 5 people on our pics? We can party with 30 or 40 people, & it looks like it was 5 of us sitting around laughing ate ach other. We have to be self absorbed narcissists or because we only take pics of ourselves. There were like 15 other people at that party last night & it looks like no one was there.
My last thought has to do with sleeping arrangements at Jaren’s house. I slept on the couch in his family room, Chris & Miah slept in their computer room. Where they slept in that room had me really confused in the morning. The room features a futon, a comfortable sleeping arrangement. I assumed one took the floor, the other the futon. Upon arising in the morning, I found a very different seen. While walking by the room on my way out, blankets in hand, I looked into the room. What I found was shocking. Miah & Chris were in the same bed. Apparently it isn’t gay because Miah was in a sleeping bag. It may not have been gay guys, but it was hilarious, two of the bulkiest guys I know, huddled in a bed together. Hot….
Here is the pic link.
Anyways… See ya when I see ya… Peace
